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Sweet Cheeks (LOST Cookies)

My apologies for not posting this earlier today, but work had me busy at an assembly and we had a full schedule with some house issues after that. It’s way late at night and we still haven’t had a chance to watch LOST, but once I get this post off, my eyes will shift over to the tv. This is actually the first week this entire season that I didn’t make a LOST bento because I had to get these LOST cookies done before the finale on Sunday and I already had lunch provided at the event today.

Sweet Cheeks

While these cookies are simply sugar cookies, they are different because each cookie features a Sawyer nickname. I call them Sweet Cheeks, after one of my favorite female pet names that he’s used on several occasions. I came up with the concept for these cookies weeks ago and it’s by far the one I had the most fun making.

Previously on LOST…

I went to Foodgawker to search for a “best sugar cookie” recipe but all the ones I looked at had some exotic ingredient listed that I didn’t have or had no idea how to acquire. Eventually I ended up at Our Best Bites and used their recipe.

Butter & Sugar

The first thing I needed was of course, butter and sugar. I sifted the flour, salt, and my expired baking powder in another bowl. Half the time I bake cookies, it’s with expired baking soda because every other time I bake cookies, I’ll buy a new bottle. The next time, it has been so long since I baked cookies that the bottle has aged past its date. I really wish this stuff lasted longer, but it didn’t seem to matter as the cookies tasted good anyway.

Dough

Here’s the dough all mixed up. Notice my cool new red Martha Stewart rubber spatula? I got it at Macy’s this weekend. When I was making dessert for Mother’s Day I gave Buddy my rubber spatula to lick pudding off and he ended up gnawing the rubber off. Not to worry, he didn’t eat any, as I found pieces of rubber all over the living room. *grrr*

Letters

I busted out the Williams Sonoma Message in a Cookie Kit that I’d bought last Christmas, but never used. I actually have the holiday version, not the one I linked, but they appear to be basically the same. You get some cutters with springs and slots to fit the pre-made words as well as a dishwasher bag full of individual letters. As you can see, they were kind enough to provide tons of Es. No matter for this batch of cookies though, as I just pressed the letters in one by one.

Cutting Dough

Since I’d gotten up at the butt crack of dawn to make these, I didn’t have much time to chill it in the fridge, but a quick trip to the freezer seemed to do the trick. I used a Paper Clay Mold I bought on J-List recently. They’re meant for clay, but they worked great as a cookie cutter this time. You can just use whatever shape you want, but make sure it’s not too small as you won’t be able to write long words.

Cookies

After I cut the cookies out, I laid them on my baking sheet and then one by one, I pressed in different nicknames that Sawyer has used over the last six seasons of LOST. Since I only had time for one batch, I picked out my favorite names. I have a list of a hundred different things you can write on your Sweet Cheeks that will be provided at the end of this post.

I baked them for 13 minutes on 350 degrees, but they came out rather pale, so I think maybe a bit more time would help give them a golden color. I’ve taken a picture of each cookie, so the Losties out there can see if they remember which character Sawyer was referring to when he said it. Answers to be provided at the end. No cheating!

Twitchy

This is one of my hands-down favorites. The full line is, “Welcome to the meeting, Twitchy.”

Cupcake

This one is probably hard, since it’s easy to hear Sawyer calling any of the girls on the island “cupcake”. The full line was, “How come you’re suddenly so interested, Cupcake?”

Mr. Clean

This one is so easy you don’t even need the line, but here it is anyway: “Oh, I don’t know, Mr. Clean, I probably would have gone around Mt. Vesuvius.”

Chucky

Another easy one. You guys better be getting Mr. Clean and this one automatically! “Hey, Chucky, want to keep that kid quiet?”

Dimwit

I actually made a mistake here and this one is a Miles cookie. You get extra bonus points if you can get this one. It’s from the episode, “Some Like It Hoth”, which is one of the greatest pun episode titles ever.

Dr. Giggles

Geez, I seem to like easy ones. The full line here was, “Oh happy day, here comes Dr. Giggles.”

Yoda

This one is from the worst season, Season 4. “You’re wasting your time, Yoda.”

Jabba

I had to put the Star Wars ones side by side! 🙂 “Well, you got a little love connection brewing over there, Jabba?”

Deep Dish

A lot of these seem to be from Season 2. I guess that might be why it’s one of my favorites after Season 5. “What can I do you for, Deep Dish?”

Stay Puft

No, this is not a Ghostbusters cookie! “Well, gosh, you sure know how to butter a man up, Stay Puft.”

Sweet Cheeks

Isn’t this a great name for a Sawyer cookie? Wouldn’t you bake a thousand sweet cheeks to have Sawyer call you Sweet Cheeks? LOL! Anyway, he uses it on two gals, so you can get a point for either, but here’s a line.

“Hey, Sweet Cheeks, I had no idea how bad you wanted off this rock.”

Chief

This is a pretty common nickname for Sawyer and there are a total of five correct answers, so I’m not going to give a quote here.

Barbar

This was one of the funniest ones because the person Sawyer is talking to immediately corrects him to say that it’s Babar, not Barbar. “If this was a scary movie I’d be with a hot chick, not you, Barbar.”

Sulu

Sorry for the blurry picture here, this cookie is obviously traveling at warp speed. “Sulu, over here, is packing a suitcase full of salted fish.”

Hot Lips

Baby Girl could read this one and she immediately asked to eat it. I dunno if I should be worried. “You want me, Hot Lips, you’re going to have to come down here and get me.”

Gizmo

This one is probably one of the hardest ones, so if you get it, give yourself two points. “You ready to give us a name, Gizmo?”

Kong

This one was used fairly recently. “Easy on the ribs, there, Kong.”

Scottie

Being a Trekkie, I loved this one just as much as the Sulu one. “Easy, Scottie, everything’s cool.”

Ginger

This one should be easy to deduce, even for the non-hardcores. “Shut it, Ginger, or you’re getting one too.”

Blondie

And we end with a heartbreaker. “Where you think you’re going, Blondie?”

If you want to make these cookies, all you’ll need is some basic cookie ingredients using the recipe I linked, a cookie cutter, and a Message in a Cookie kit. Here are more names you can use:

Magellan, Ali, Skeletor, Freckles, Cowboy, Sweetheart, Chachi, Oliver Twist, Captain Falafell, Pudding, Hoss, Daddy-O, Papa-san, Lollipop, Sister, Shortcake, Chinatown, Tarzan, Avalanche, Captain Bunny Killer, Zorro, Mr. Miyaji, Al-Jazeera, Rerun, Jackass, Captain A-rab, Muhammad, Sticks, Short Round, Tattoo, Sassafras, Mama Sita, Dr. Quinn, Dr. Do-Right, Sundance, Croc Hunter, Hammo, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, Grimace, Pops, Mikey, Rambina, Shaft, Brutus, Norma Rae, Jumbotron, Moonbeam, Coolhand, Jungle Boy, Jiminy Cricket, Mutton Chop, Jethro, Snuffy, Daniel Boone, Pillsbury, Jin-bo, Ponce de Leon, Mr. Ed, Bruce Lee from the Freighter, Chicken Little, Ghenghis, Shaggy, Dr. Wizard, Plato, Bonzai, Mad Scientist, Mr. I Speak to Dead People, HG Wells, Nemo, LaFleur, Boar Expert, Thelma, Dr. Quinn, Sunshine, Chesty, Mamacita, Quick Draw, Frenchie, Babynapper

These combined with the cookies I made would give you about a hundred different Sweet Cheeks, so just pick the ones that you like the most and press those in. You should end up with a pretty cool snack at your LOST party this Sunday! (provided you have a Williams Sonoma nearby…)

Sweet Cheeks Cookies

Now for the quiz answers! Post and let me know how many you got right out of a total possible 22 points.

  1. Twitchy – Faraday
  2. Cupcake – Ana Lucia
  3. Mr. Clean – Locke
  4. Chucky – Charlie
  5. Dimwit – Hurley (1 bonus point)
  6. Dr. Giggles – Jack
  7. Yoda – Ben
  8. Jabba – Hurley
  9. Deep Dish – Hurley
  10. Stay Puft – Hurley
  11. Sweet Cheeks – Shannon, Kate
  12. Chief – Horace, Jin, Sayid, Charles Widmore, Michael
  13. Barbar – Hurley
  14. Sulu – Jin
  15. Hot Lips – Ana Lucia
  16. Gizmo – Ben (1 bonus point)
  17. Kong – Hurley
  18. Scottie – Desmond
  19. Ginger – Charlotte
  20. Blondie – Juliet

As you can see, a ton of these belong to Hurley, so after you tally up your numbers, take a gander at this old but hilarious scene:

This amazing tv show ends this Sunday, so be sure to serve up some LOST party food while watching The End!